Name Frederick Douglass Free Press ‘Personality’ of the week

2/10/2017, 10:28 p.m.

Would the Richmond Free Press please name Frederick Douglass as its next “Personality” of the week after having been named Abolitionist of the Year 2017 by President Donald Trump?

I, for one, would like to know what he has being doing with his time since 1895. After this latest honor, where is his current residence? What does his family think of this latest honor?

Here are some of Mr. Douglass’ possible answers as the Personality:

When people first meet me, they probably think: I look a little ghostly.

The one thing I can’t stand: Racist idiots masquerading as president.

Best late-night snack: A Donald Whopper from Trump Tower.

Person who influenced me the most: Donald Trump. This fascist monster would cause anyone to want to rise from the dead to do something about our current state of affairs.

Book that influenced me the most: “The Art of the Dirtily Done Deal of 2017.”

What I’m reading now: “A Ghost of a Chance: How to Survive Donald Trump.”

My next goal: To run for president in 2020 after America, in hindsight, realizes the mistake it made in 2016.

Start running Frederick Douglass for President ads. The ghost of Frederick Douglass in the White House would be so much better than the horrible reality that is Donald Trump!